One huge--and necessary--part of the writing process is critiques. Nobody in their right mind wants a negative critiqued. We all want immediate praise. Well, I personally like negative critiques (because they are super helpful) but remember I said 'nobody in their RIGHT MIND'?
When a woman has a baby and she shows her most-gorgeous-baby-in-the-whole-world-but-really-it-has-crazy-eyes to her friends, her friends all reply, 'You're baby is the most cutest baby I've ever seen.'
Well writing doesn't work that way.
When we hand our babies (otherwise known as the manuscript) over, and it's ugly as sin, we're going to hear it.
'Your baby manuscript is one only the mother writer could love.'
or
'Well, all babies manuscripts are ugly at first.'
Don't be offended. Get used to it. Learn to cherish the moments. You're going to have to go through the same thing when you send your
Cherish critiques? How?
Learn that (a) not everyone likes the same book. We all have different tastes. (And really, thank god for that, or else poor Angelina, we would all be after Brad Pitt.) (b) critiques make us better writers. So really listen to what they tell you.
We all want to be good
Pic source: here
52 comments:
I hate to use the term "real writer" because anyone who writes is a writer, BUUUUT if there is a deciding characteristic that makes someone a "real writer" I say it's the ability to accept constructive critiques graciously and with an open mind and to even become hungry for them.
P.S. Thank you for your tips at my place! I am pretty goal oriented so those should do the trick. :)
Clarissa - I really like your analogy. We do so often get deeply, deeply attached to our manuscripts. But unlike children, manuscripts need editing. So critiques can be incredibly helpful. Staying open to them and getting past taking it personally is important.
Hi Clarissa,
I have to agree. My critique group has helped me in so many ways. They've humbled me while helping me.
Donna
This is why it is of utter importance to have honest friends and beta-readers, not some people who know nothing and will be unhelpful with their comments and advice on your work.
Very true. We must accept that not everyone will like our writing!
And I really value critiques (prior to publication, ha!) because it can only help make the finished product stronger.
I think it's we writers begin to accept "good" critiques that we really begin to grow as writers.
I always want to shake newbies who defend their work and I want to say, "Honestly, this person is trying to help you. All your baby needs is a nose job, not a face transplant." :)
This is a fabulous metaphor. I don't know that I've heard it put so eloquently before.
I appreciate your disclaimer at the beginning, but it really wasn't necessary.
Accepting criticism positively is a necessity for all writers, even the well-known ones.
Cherish your critiques: they might possibly save you from embarrassment.
Yes!! Grow thicker skins people!! LOL! Take care
x
I always ask my beta readers to give me more of what's wrong than what's right. That's the part I can't see on my own.
LOL. Oh I'm sure Brad Pitt wouldn't mind if we all loved him :o)
Being told what's wrong with your baby is overrated.
This is a great analogy. One of the things that has been difficult for me lately has been to provide feedback on a book that received no critiques on it and that the author self-published. He came to me looking for a review and praise and I see so many things wrong with it. I suggested that he allow me to edit it for him but that is a delicate balance so I'm afraid I didn't feel comfortable in just outright telling him that the manuscript had a lot of things that needed work. Instead I just said, "It's fine." I guess I just didn't want to tell an author who had already published his book that I thought the baby was ugly.
Ok, that picture is TOTALLY CREEPING ME OUT.
Ahem. :)
And I wholeheartedly agree about not everyone liking the same book. Which is why I think it's important to find crit partners that are in your genre, or at least like you kind of writing. So you can get that out of the way. "We all like time traveling zombies, yes?" "Yes!" "Okay, then, how does this time traveling zombie story need some work?"
It's better for everyone that way! :)
What a great analogy. It's so hard at first, but I've found, at least for me, the longer you work with other writers, and the more critiques you get, the easier it becomes to accept them for what they are: helpful.
Receiving feedback from a critique can be hard, but it's so important to have an open mind. It will make us better writers, but only if we are willing to listen.
Fathers are very important too >;)
(and I'm not angry, of course)
I've never got critique on my fiction writing, because I don't show it to anyone. But I get peer reviews on my science papers,and sometimes the reviews are quite aggressive and very negative. Usually the reviews improve the manuscript >:)
Cold As Heaven
Too true. Even you should be happy to be critiqued at all. How many people do have the time to critique an entire book?
Great point! (and hilarious "baby" photo there) It IS subjective and not everyone will like our babies. And we have to practice with our writing babies so they look better. Our CPs can help us with that (they're usually pretty nice about that!).
Oh, how true. When it comes to critiques you have to detach from your darling and listen to what those trusted readers have to say and how they apply. It's all about constructive criticism and how to make your baby the very best it can be.
Also keep in mind what a pubbed author who critiques some of my work told me. It's good and that goes without saying but I mark those things that need sharpening to make it read better. Might need revising, different POV, tightening of the plot...
Don't assume that when the ms come back all marked up that everything is bad and they hated it.
I appreciate my crits!
Sia McKye's Thoughts...OVER COFFEE
A clever analogy! It all makes sense also...
That analogy is priceless! (And I've seen some ugly babies.) That's why we hand our stuff over to critique partners - so they WILL find the ugly stuff!
Hah! "...most-gorgeous-baby-in-the-whole-world-but-really-it-has-crazy-eyes..." I love it.
Is it a form of cruelty to lock your manuscript up in the attic where it will never see the light of day again?
haha! I'll never look at a baby/manuscript the same. Great comparison!
That picture is awesome! Because it's so weird, I'll see it in my mind and remember this post.
It's true. Critiques are invalauble. When I put up an excerpt, I WANT criticism, honest criticism. Like the story or not, I try to be objective and focus on what's wrong with the writing/structure/etc. and not on my personal reading preferences. If we do this, we can really help each other.
Ann Best, Author of In the Mirror, A Memoir of Shattered Secrets
Such a great post! Love visiting your blog!
Lola x
http://lola-x.blogspot.com
Helpful advice with a cute-ugly baby picture.
I'm glad to join your following too.
PS I already joined. Silly me. I'll be back.
great post :D
This made me think about when the nurse brought in my second son, Cal, to nurse, soon after he was born. In those days they whisked the baby away and you only saw them at feeding time. I laughed when I saw him - he had big cheeks and a sprig of red hair on top - he looked like Baby Huey ( a big baby bird from a cartoon). I loved him though. the nurses didn't get it. They thought I was unnatural.
Constructive criticism is so important for our writing, even though it can hurt at times (we do get attached to our babies!) I've just had an in depth critique on a chapter, that stung at first, but having digested it I now know how to make my writing even stronger.
I actually like it when my critiquers get into it and tell me what they really think. How else can I improve?
Yes, Yes, Yes! Right on. A good crit can transform my work. I can always look back and see how it's improved.
One among many good things about a critique is that you can always accept or reject a suggestion. Ultimately, it's your baby, your decision, whatever works best for you. Love these tips, always. :)
I must not be in the right mind either because I also love "negative critiques". That's the one thing I actually worry the most about when I get good critiques. I often wonder if it's really good or if they're just being "nice". Great post! stopping by from the ISWG
What a well-phrased analogy. I'm glad you clearly defined the helpful critique from the not-so-helpful.
And REALLY glad you mentioned the "in my right mind" phrase. Ha! Glad I am not alone.
And thanks for your kind comment on my blog. I'm late with my acknowledgement, apologies.
LOL! Yes, it's easy to get too attached to our work.
And it's a good thing I'm not a mother because I think 99% of all babies are not attractive.
Excellent post! Thanks.
Really great points. Make yourself happy, everyone else is icing :)
This is priceless :) And the analogy is spot on.
.....dhole
Thanks Clarissa, you've turned criticism into encouragement. I love it. Best critique I ever got was from my wife 'why did you put this bit in?' 'Because that's what happened.' Her reply? I'm sure you've guessed it - 'its a story. It doesn't matter what happened. Just make it interesting and exciting for your readers.'
Reminds me of Jacksfilms, where one youtuber called him gay and he immediatly went sad :P
Eek! You're right, but still, it's so hard to absorb the hard critiques and work on making the story even better. We need even thicker skins!
My written products will always be my babies to me, but it's good to see them grow up and stand on their own. Critique that is honest and well-intended is a good thing for sure.
Lee
Tossing It Out
This has been a hard lesson to learn, but I've found that negative critiques are always helpful, as long as they are focused on what's working (or not). As difficult as it to take criticism, it is part of being a professional and an absolute necessity to improving our writing. Thanks for the reminder Clarissa!
Writing tastes are always going to be subjective, and like you said, thank god for that! I like your analogy here!
P.S. Congrats: you're a semi-finalist in the Judge & Jury Blogfest:) Nice job!
Hi, new follower and fellow insecure writer here. Just wanted to say I love your metaphor here - my book is DEFINITELY like my baby, and it's HARD to hear critique about it, even when I know I need it. But it's always best to find a good critique group or partner and be opened to what they have to say! Great post!
- http://pensuasion.blogspot.com/
You're so right. I'll take the bad with the good knowing it will help me grow and learn in the long run.
nice post :D
Yeah well all need to hear 'it smells' occasionally as long as there is a solid reason why to back it up or some idea of what you can try to do to fix it.
The fine line between ripping someone open to let them bleed out and constructive criticism is that CC has the reasons listed (the why) and the suggestions (the how). It is not you must do this lecture though. That rarely works.
But everyone finds their own way.
Without honest feedback, no one will ever improve.
T
Excellent post with great points, thanks Clarissa!
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